3.13.2006

black pepper

given that everybody lies, why is lying still such a big issue? i mean so many people still give a moral value to it, even if they admit they lie as well. but then you'd think they admit it, again, for moral reason. you know to look like liars but in the end not such bad liars...

intensify says
I have no idea why I do this. I’m not a liar (though of course, both liars and non-liars say that, and are in keeping with their character), but I tell lies to hide the truth, to make things interesting, or just to fill the time.
now this is what i call a non-liar. not because she doesn't lies, but because she sees it as a normal part of life. just like, say, i like chocolate cakes. but this is bringing the issue to a superior level, i.e. the problem of morality in modern society which has been in my opinion widely and wisely discussed some decades ago by nietzsche and is still valid for the most part.

spring and snow

of course there are many people that tell lies only to get advantage of others, and this makes a bastard of them.
so basically is not telling lie that is bad, but the reason why u do it. for instance i often lie because people don't understand me when i tell the truth. but that's not my fault. i also lie just because but that's so close to irony that can't really be called a lie and anyway it doesn't harm anyone. and i also lie to hide truths that would make other people suffer. and this is the worst lying thing i think and i want to change that in my life. this is like my personal goal to become a better person, be brave enough to tell a friend, look, u suck. i also lie because i don't want people to think i'm a bad person. this happens because their moral values are way different from mines but i still need for some reason to keep in a good relation. if they have fucked up moral values it's not my fault though.

most of us, uhm, ok, all of us lie mostly because we don't want to reveal all of ourselves to others. like i'd never tell my parents i dance with 5 different girls at night hoping that my girlfriend doesn't find out or tell my grandma that i'm with that girl not because i love her but because i have good sex with her. which by the way would also be a lie because i don't have sex with her because i can't find a friggin flat!!!
uhm... but this is more like not telling the whole truth.

limes

tinto brass once replied, when asked for advice for a "perfect relationship"
never tell a lie, but never ask for the whole truth either
and he is so right. so totally right.

and i believe there is a big difference between lying and not telling the whole truth, in the way you do it, but in the end it's just the same. say i tell my dad i'm going shopping but in fact i'm going on drugs with my friend, that's a lie. but if a tell my dad i'm going out instead? does it make any difference? i'm not so sure. it's more a formal difference, then a difference in substance i think... or not? well in the end i don't think that lying is bad at all except for a few cases when it's really fucked up so not telling the whole truth also is not bad.

and i did try to be completely sincere once, with one of my girlfriends. i did, she did. if i went with another girl i'd tell her and if she asked me for details i'd tell her as well and she did the same with me. that kept jealousy totally out of the relationship, but to know everything, absolutely everything about the other is cool at first, but got boring after a while. i want my girlfriend to hide things from me. it's more interesting i think.

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